I Did Not Make It Up.

“I’m never going to accomplish anything; that’s perfectly clear to me.
I’m never going to be famous. My name will never be writ large on
the roster of Those Who Do Things. I don’t do anything. Not one single
thing. I used to bite my nails, but I don’t even do that any more.” 
– Dorothy Parker
“The Little Hours,” in Here Lies (1939)