Long before the Wizard of Ads became known as the Wizard of Ads, he was a very plain boy known as Little Roy. They called him this, not because he was small, but because his father was also named Roy, as were both of his grandfathers, and when the Roys are so thick you can stir them with a stick, the youngest will be given the honorific of “Little.” At least that’s how it is in Oklahoma, and since this is where our story begins, you may be certain that what I’m saying is true.

When Little Roy was 11 his father vanished and left his mother with two children and no money other than the few sad coins she had in her purse. And the court-ordered child support never arrived. But she, being an Oklahoman whose family survived the dust bowl days by hunkering down and doing without, was an imminently resourceful woman who knew how to survive when the night showed no stars and the pale blue of day was thin and unsatisfying like soup made with too much water.

Lessons learned the hard way are accelerated by pain and thus, need rarely to be repeated. Little Roy learned quickly.

Three things doth Little Roy remember that were taught to him by his mother.

The first thing she taught him was how to have a happy marriage.
The second thing she taught him was how to succeed in business.
The third thing she taught him was that roses are for the living. She said:

“When a person dies, that person’s friends will rearrange their schedules, take time off work, buy airplane tickets and expensive flowers and go to visit their friend and say nice things about their friend that their friend will never hear. And the memories those people will carry away from that day will be of their friend lying dead in a box. They will tell you they did these things to honor their friend, but I fear they waited too long.”

“When you have a friend who is worth airplane tickets, buy those tickets while your friend still lives and take them on an adventure. Give your friend roses while your friend walks by your side and tell your friend what you like best about them. And if you awaken one day to find that your friend is gone, you will have the memory of the day you spent laughing together, surrounded by the fragrance of roses.”

Little Roy’s mom is currently in Europe on an adventure with a friend.
The friend is happily aware that Little Roy’s mom does not plan to attend her funeral.

– Indiana Beagle