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The Monday Morning Memo

Three minutes after we encountered Brian and Autumn
and snapped a couple of quick photos of him snapping her, the wizard and I wandered into Corrine Taylor’s office and watched horrified and helpless as she was pummeled, baited, badgered and verbally abused on the telephone by the mother of a bride. It seems that one of her daughter’s bridal party had flushed their underwear down the toilet in our bathroom, causing the plumbing to back up and the bathrooms to become unusable. We know this because the plumber later showed us the underwear he retreived from the pipes. Anyway, this woman went on and on and on for 40 minutes about how she and her daughter were due some sort of financial compensation for their inconvenience due to our bathrooms being unusable. This sort of thing makes me sad and furious at the same time. 

Small people complain. 

If it weren’t for the Brians and Autumns, we’d just close Chapel Dulcinea forever and let people go back to getting married in those drab, dusty offices in the weary courthouses of their towns. There, a radiant bride and anxious groom and bat-crap-crazy mother of the bride can soak up all the joy of standing in line behind people waiting to pay traffic tickets. And if the bathroom isn’t right, the mother of the bride can pitch a fit to the judge. Demand an apology and some cash from him. Let me know what he decides.

God bless Corrine Taylor for dealing with all the lunatics, whiners, malcontents and professional victims. 

– Indy

PS – In the spirit of my rant about lunatics, whiners, malcontents and professional victims, I present to you this quirky little video. It has received 2,569,837 views on YouTube in exactly 365 days. That’s nearly 7,000 per day, 300 per hour, 5 per minute, 24 hours a day for a year. 

A NOTE FROM THE ALAMO DRAFTHOUSE,
AUSTIN’S FAVORITE MOVIE THEATER:
“We do not tolerate people that talk or text in the theater. In fact, before every film, we have several warnings on screen to prevent such happenings. Occasionally, someone doesn’t follow the rules, and we do, in fact, kick their asses out of our theater. This video is an actual voicemail from a woman that was kicked out of one of our Austin theaters. Thanks, anonymous woman, for being awesome.”
PLEASE NOTICE THE WARNING AT THE TOP OF THIS VIDEO THAT
THE LANGUAGE IS UNCENSORED. BELIEVE IT.

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- Indiana Beagle

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