Whittington was obsessed all week with an album recorded by Jeff Bridges to help people sleep. You can download the album for however much you’re willing to donate to No Kid Hungry. Here’s what one reviewer said about it: Going to sleep with the acting legend is a bit like listening to the ramblings of an uncle who did […]

“Without oak” means they age it in stainless steel tanks instead of oak casks. Anyway, the taste is very bright and clean. The sound I heard instantly – and I know this is going to sound weird – was the sound of that metal triangle the chuckwagon cook rings at supper time during a cattle drive. […]

“Do something that needs to be done. Fight for someone who needs you to fight for them because they cannot fight for themselves. Rise up from this pleasure-saturated society and tackle a problem that’s bigger than you are.”

Indy’s Product Placement of the Week   Scott Fraser is the owner of Milne Court, the most successful convenience store in North America. It’s not just the total number of dollars he brings in that makes Scott #1. It’s the number of dollars compared to the potential of the marketplace he’s in. Check this out: The […]

And the truth I see is that the Bible is populated with people like you and me. People who are flawed and imperfect. People who have crooked teeth and bad skin. Who have stinky breath and dirty feet. Who don’t always know the difference between right and wrong. Who are self-serving and capricious. People caught in the conflict […]

Respect for the privacy of my friend prohibits me from showing you the handwritten note, but this is the first paragraph I read when I opened Secrets in the Dark to a random page to see whether or not Beuchner could write. His description below of the people who inhabit the Bible reminded me of […]

“On the Way,” this 1960 oil painting by Max Ginsburg, is coming up for auction and the opening bid will be just $250. Even if it goes for the expected price of $500 to $1,000, it’s a great deal. I’m sharing this with you because it doesn’t fit my own collection but I’d like to think […]

Standing Outside of Time Standing outside the iron bars of Time, the written word watches us like a little boy licking an ice cream cone watches tigers in a zoo cage, not caring at all that tigers like ice cream, too. The tigers are trapped. The boy is not. Likewise, you and I are trapped […]

It was the illuminations that had brought me there. I had been hearing and reading about them for so long that I was genuinely keen to see them. So, after securing a room in a modest guesthouse on a back street, I hastened to the front in a sense of some expectation. Well, all I […]

“But hear what? Hear what? The Bible is hundreds upon hundreds of voices all calling at once out of the past and clamoring for our attention like barkers at a fair, like air-raid sirens, like a whole barnyard of cock crows as the first long shafts of dawn fan out across the sky. Some of […]

This is the terminus page of the rabbit hole, the end of the SAFE ZONE. If you continue, even one innocent click, you will most certainly be exposed to religious contemplation, political commentary, and blatant sales pitches. I am Indy. You have been warned.

The Wizard Academy Board of Directors plus Pennie and Roy, 2015 (L to R) Corrine Taylor, Mark Fox, Pennie Williams, Dr. Oz Jaxxon, Dr. Lori Barr, Dr. Richard D. Grant, Jean Backus, Roy H. Williams, Dennis Collins Photo by Indiana Beagle I like to see my name big.

Let’s go wandering around the Enchanted Emporium, that weird bookstore and Welcome Center at Wizard Academy…

This Week’s Question: Oh Great and Wise Indiana Beagle, Official Spokesdog for Manchego Cheese and Famous Watchdog of that barely average Wizard of Ads, here is my question: Which is more important, beauty or charm? – Kit Carrington Dear Kit, Oscar Wilde answered this rather well when he was advising men 100 years ago. Oskie said, A […]

Traditions of the Cognoscenti Twilight has fallen on the work-week; it’s four o’clock Friday at the Toad and Ostrich. I drop into one of the leather Chesterfields with a long stem glass of purple coffee as the other Cognoscenti step onto the quarterdeck from the fire escape. Moments later they step through the porthole doorway and […]

This week, Whitmeister Brittington began his contemplation of the third gravitating bodies that will pull your attention incontrovertibly into the songs of his new album when it’s released in March. I snagged this photo when he thought he was alone at Chapel Dulcinea. After Brittington left the chapel, he inserted a rap passage into a melancholy blues […]

This is Devin’s “When Ozzy Came to Visit While I Was in the Navy” face.

Peter Hammond says, “just as the United States has a Tomb of the Unknown Soldier to honor all the unidentified servicemen who have died for their country, why shouldn’t Wizard Academy have a Room of the Unknown Lost Boy to honor all the unidentified creators whose depth of brilliance wasn’t recognized during their lifetime?” Excellent idea, Peter! We received […]

This is a dog’s-eye view of the corner where the Academy parking lot meets the beginning of the exit road. I do a little business here from time to time.

Stuart Maue is trained as a professional clown. And when he recently spent an afternoon at Wizard Academy’s Toad and Ostrich pub, he proved it. Can you believe this? TOAD AND OSTRICH!

Choria greets brides and grooms who are hoping to get married at Chapel Dulcinea. What a great place this is!

“Since Penelope Noakes of Duppas Hill is gone, there is no one who will ever call me Nellie again.” – an old lady, First and Last Things by Richard Hoggart, p. 234. The statement is attributed to W.H. Auden by poet Alfred Corn in his book, Autobiographies “There was a day in time when the last […]

Devin Wright shows us his GoodFellas face in the kitchen of Spence Manor “Hirsh was a good friend. I remember one time we robbed this liquor store. And he ran over a dog. He cried for two days over that dog. Anyway, he’ll be missed by so many of us that got left behind. He was a witness to […]

Say it Through Actions, Not Adjectives. The Art of Crafting a Scene and Telling a Story Chapter One Chris Maddock says, “Show, don’t tell.  Use your words to show me what’s happening. Don’t tell me. Make me see it in my mind.” Indiana Beagle gave you two excellent examples of that technique this week in […]

I’m giving you a BeaglesGuide Bonus this week because Jeffrey and Mia brought over TWO bottles of obscure wine, not just one. The music of this wine seems to be all Celtic Woman softness but I can’t be certain because we didn’t taste it until after we had awakened the Sagrantino, that brooding Spanish monster of 250 […]

When Jeffrey and Mia were coming to have dinner with the wizard and the princess and me, they stopped at the finest wine shop in Austin and said, We’re having dinner tonight with Indiana Beagle.” The owner of the shop raised a finger, smiled and said, “Ah, then you will be needing a very obscure wine.” […]

LOS is a musician, a rapper who can often be seen in company with Vice-Chancellor Whittington. When he’s not performing, LOS helps to prepare Wizard Academy for classes. I was having lunch with him and Whittington at Hecho en Mexico, a marvelous little place famous for the elegant food of the Mexican interior (not to be confused with Tex-Mex, […]

The House of the Lost Boys will be a new student mansion on the campus of Wizard Academy. Its six rooms will mean that we’ll be able to accomodate twenty-four people on campus, (not including the bed in Rocinante II.) We don’t yet have permission, the blueprints or the money to build this new student […]

The BeagleSword was a happy old fart and the rabbit hole was a truck that doesn’t whine. Jeff Buckley, cut off in his prime, is the musician among Wizard Academy’s Lost Boys. His brothers are a painter, Vincent Van Gogh, a novelist, John Kennedy Toole, an actor, James Dean, and  an athlete, Manolete. The sixth Lost Boy has yet […]

had never been to Cafe Malta.  During his first visit to the cafe with Princess Pennie and the wizard and me, I asked him to see if he could hear the music in the wine. This is what he gave me: Unmistakably Italian, a pleasing blend of strength and softness, boldness and subtlety. The flavor rises […]

I spend a lot of time with the wizard, so I think I know what makes him tick. You know how he said he identifies with Don Quixote? Well, Ze Frank, another of his heroes, explained it in 2012 when he said, Once I was lucky enough to take a class with the great clown teacher […]

The only difference between Steinbeck’s Rocinante and ours is that his was dark green and ours is what GMC called “Palamino,” which, you may know, is a specific color of horse.  Let’s buy this thing! Take a look at what you get when you agree to help.  

After she read the wizard’s rant last week about whiners, cognoscenti Trisha Sylvestre sent this important legal-compliance update.  You should probably check it out. WhinerReport Trisha and her husband Jeff helped us purchase the landmark sculpture of The Old Man and The Sea for the Wizard Academy Campus. This photo of Trisha was taken in the […]

 The mortality rate for young men in society is six times what it is for young women, from violence and from accidents, just the stupid stuff that young men do; jumping off of things they shouldn’t jump off of, lighting things on fire they shouldn’t light on fire, I mean, you know what I’m talking […]

Whiners piss me off. I’m not trying to be shocking or crude, I’m just trying to make a point. The reason whiners piss me off, I think, is because they seem to believe that Injustice and Hardship have somehow singled them out for a special beating. Listen, whiner, everyone is ambushed by catastrophe occasionally. Quit acting […]

PREFACE The novelist Elmore Leonard once explained the secret to his success: I try to leave out the parts that people skip.” I chose not to do that in this book. I decided to let you choose for yourself which parts to skip. Having made this choice, I run the risk of Charles Dickens who […]

On the third day there was a wedding in Cana of Galilee, and the mother of Jesus was there. Now both Jesus and His disciples were invited to the wedding. And when they ran out of wine, the mother of Jesus said to Him, They have no wine.” Jesus said to her, Woman, what does […]

Do you remember our John Steinbeck Travels With Charley project? The wizard’ll give you new details in next week’s Monday Morning Memo. Way cool. BEFORE YOU CLICK TO THE NEXT PAGE Keep in mind that this is the terminus page of the Safe Zone. I just gave you the BeagleSword. If you click beyond here, you open yourself […]

Details in next week’s Monday Morning Memo.

Sancho and the Don is not one of Baldomero Romero Ressendi’s more important works, but it is a genuine Baldomero Romero Ressendi nonetheless. And that makes the wizard happy. This painting is currently in his conference room but we’re searching for a place to hang it in the tower. Romero died just a year after the wizard and […]

 

Sean Taylor can fix anything. One day he decided to put an electric engine in a 1932 Ford Coupe. We’re lucky to have him as Campus Superintendant.

Among his other endeavors, Andy Warhol managed a band, Lou Reed and the Velvet Underground.  The only song that would become a popular hit was Lou Reed’s deceptively upbeat, “A Walk on the Wild Side.” Although the group experienced little commercial success, the Velvet Underground is often cited by critics as one of the most important and […]

“Frankly there isn’t anyone you can’t learn to love once you’ve heard their story.” – Andrew Stanton, screenwriter

Painted by Emile Vernon (French, 1872-1919) a contemporary of Teddy Roosevelt. The girl who sat for this painting isn’t merely the decorative artifact she might appear to be. Her name is Hominy Jones. She is an American studying fashion “on the Continent” as they used to say. But Hominy’s ideas on fashion are a bit ahead […]

I want a girl with a mind like a diamond. I want a girl who knows what’s best. I want a girl with shoes that cut and eyes that burn like cigarettes. I want a girl with the right allocations who is fast and thorough and sharp as a tack. She is playing with her […]

The taste of this wine made me do a double-take. I wasn’t sure if it was the honking of wild geese or a clarinet played by an amateur. Either way, you hear it, right? It’s not a bad taste. It’s just got a goose-voice edge in the alto range. The wild boar was the wrong […]

Go ahead and start the MP3 before you continue reading. Go to the Kickstarter page by clicking any of the images of musicians below. FUN FACT: The brief noise you hear at the opening of the song and again at 3:20 isn’t brushes on symbols. It’s a rattlesnake. A real one. 35 seconds in, listen […]

I must study politics and war, that our sons may have liberty to study mathematics and philosophy. Our sons ought to study mathematics and philosophy, geography, natural history and naval architecture, navigation, commerce and agriculture in order to give their children a right to study painting, poetry, music, architecture, statuary, tapestry and porcelain.” – John […]

“Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.” – Carl Sagan

Salvatore Petruolo painted this in Naples, Italy in 1887. It was his 30th birthday. The food at the party was excellent. – Indy

“eclectic” Is that just another word for “unfocused”? Think about it… Folk… Electronica… 60’s Pop… and Classical?

Did you think I was making all that stuff up? If so, I have just three things to say to you: 1. Heh, 2. heh, 3. heh. When you think you know the answers, email them to Andrew@WizardOfAds.com You have only until Sunday night, January 11, at 11:59PM because at the stroke of midnight, your carriage […]

This is what Halle heard.  Can you name the instrument?   If you can name the instument, just add it to your list of answers for Andrew@WizardOfAds.com But I’m getting ahead of myself. You don’t yet know about creating a list of answers for Andrew. But you will. Heh, heh, heh. Indy PS – Princess Pennie says […]

On September 11, 1660, Samuel Pepys tried a new hot beverage for the first time, recording in his diary: ‘And afterwards I did send for a cup of tee ( a China drink), of which I never had drank before.’ Whether he liked it or not Pepys didn’t say, which is a shame, as it […]

I walked into this painting to look at the wooden Rocinante and the lance. But then the river gestured to me and a few words flickered into my mind. I wrote them for you in letters of white.” – Dog Quixote de La Mancha Born in Poland in 1933, Samuel Bak and his mother were hidden in the attic of a […]

This is amazing. Move the scroll bar to see the complexity and size of the observable universe.

Go ahead and start the MP3 before you continue reading. Go to the Kickstarter page by clicking any of the images of musicians below. FUN FACT: The brief noise you hear at the opening of the song and again at 3:20 isn’t brushes on symbols. It’s a rattlesnake. A real one. 35 seconds in, listen […]

Did you ever read any of the series by Orson Scott Card in which the principal protagonist was a boy named Ender Wiggins? “Fairy Tale in Dallas” is a painting by Kim Douglas Wiggins that was  auctioned on December 27th but failed to receive the opening bid of $13,000. I like to call this painting “Approach of the BeagleStorm.” Also […]